This is a post I’ve been meaning to write since March, and kind of follows on from UI Hall of Shame’s “If some Software Developers built houses” found via Slashdot (which I just added to my list of feeds, which I suspect I’m going to regret)

You arrive at the shopping centre and enter through the big doors at the front. The main concourse is a large and full of doors of all shapes and sizes. On each door in large letters (in all sorts of colours, fonts, hey - some are even blinking on and off) is the word “DOOR” or “PUSH”. Each door leads to a shop. Each shop is also full of doors marked “DOOR” or “PUSH”.

Invariably the smaller, more awkward shaped doors lead to shops with vaguely useful things in them - food stores, clothing stores, hardware stores, book shops and so on.

The largest doors either don’t open or lead to shops closed for refurbishment.

The rest of the doors lead to shops run by Nigerian Businessmen, gerbils, People helping you “Make $$$ in your spare time” or they are casinos.

When visiting a shopping centre like this is helps to take drilling equipment or high explosives in order to get out again.